It’s every parent’s worst fear—discovering that their teen is hurting themselves. Whether it’s through cutting, scratching, or other forms of self-injury, the realization can be heartbreaking and confusing. You are not alone if you’re wondering what to do or how to support your teen.
Many parents, caregivers, and teachers are navigating this same uncertainty. The good news is that healing is possible. With the right support, teens can learn healthier ways to cope, process their emotions, and move forward. If you’re concerned about a teen you love, don’t wait—get help for your teen today.
Why Does Self-Harm Happen in Teens?
Self-harm in teens is often a coping mechanism—a way to manage overwhelming emotions, stress, anxiety, or even emotional numbness. For some teens, self-harm provides a temporary sense of relief or control in moments when everything else feels chaotic.
It’s important to understand that self-harming behavior is usually not about seeking attention or trying to manipulate others. Instead, it’s often about expressing deep internal pain that feels too intense—or too complicated—to put into words. Teens may not know how to process difficult emotions or may be going through intense stress related to school, friendships, identity, bullying, trauma, or family dynamics.
Some of the most common emotional triggers include:
- Feelings of worthlessness or self-hatred
- High expectations and academic pressure
- Peer rejection or relationship problems
- Struggles with identity or body image
- Trauma or abuse
- Difficulty expressing emotions in healthy ways
These signs can often be hidden, which makes early detection crucial.
How Do You Identify Self-Harm?
So, how do you identify self-harm? While teens may go to great lengths to hide these behaviors, there are often signs you can watch for:
- Unexplained cuts, burns, bruises, or scars
- Wearing long sleeves or pants
- Bloodstains on clothing or tissues
- Sudden withdrawal from friends or family
- Emotional outbursts, mood swings, or signs of depression
- Keeping sharp objects in unexpected places
- Avoiding situations where their body might be exposed
If you notice any of these signs, don’t ignore them. It’s okay to ask questions and express concern without judgment. Your calm, loving approach can make a real difference.
What to Do If Your Child Self-Harms
Learning that your child is self-harming can feel devastating—but there is hope. Many teens recover with support, therapy, and time. So, what should you do if your child is self-injuring?
- Stay calm – Your reaction sets the tone. Express care and concern without anger, punishment, or guilt.
- Open the conversation – Gently ask about what they’re going through. You might say, “I’ve noticed some things that worry me. I love you and want to understand how you’re feeling.”
- Avoid blaming or shaming – Remember, they’re not doing this to hurt you. They’re trying to survive painful emotions.
- Seek professional help – Teens need safe, nonjudgmental spaces to work through what’s going on beneath the surface. A professional can help them build healthier coping tools and get to the root of their pain.
What to Do If a Family Member Is Self-Harming by Cutting
If you’re concerned about a sibling, cousin, or other family member, it’s normal to feel helpless or unsure of how to act. What should you do if a family member is self-harming by cutting? Start by offering a steady presence.
- Let them know you care – A simple, “I’m here if you ever want to talk,” can go a long way.
- Don’t force them to explain – Instead, help connect them to a trusted adult or therapist.
- Avoid making threats or ultimatums – These can increase shame and drive the behavior further underground.
- Encourage healthy outlets – Suggest creative, physical, or sensory-based activities that help them manage complicated feelings.
How to Deal with Someone Who Self-Harms
Figuring out how to deal with someone who self-harms—whether you’re a parent, teacher, or mentor—starts with empathy. Teens need connection more than correction.
- Keep showing up – Your consistency builds trust, even if they don’t open up right away.
- Respect their emotions – Avoid phrases like, “This is just a phase” or “You’re being dramatic.” Their pain is real, even if it’s hard to understand.
- Involve professionals – Don’t try to “fix” things on your own. Self-harm is often linked to deep emotional struggles, and teens deserve compassionate, experienced support.
At Inward Healthcare, we specialize in working with teens. Our programs are built with their unique needs in mind, offering a space that feels safe, supportive, and empowering.
Help Is Closer Than You Think. Call Today.
If you’re worried about your teen, now is the time to take that first step. At Inward Healthcare, we believe mental wellness should be a celebrated and accessible part of life—not something hidden or stigmatized.
Visit us online or call 888.576.1875 to connect with our admissions team and learn how we can help your teen take the next step toward healing.
